This tale, started in July 2003 by Raptor on the original Rodan's Roost forum, was moved to LORD KHANDEJIFER'S DOMINION on Dec 15, 2003 when the Roost underwent a cataclysmic event nearly as dire as what occurred 65 million years ago.
The K-T extinction was an episode in evolutionary history where more than 50% of all known species of that time went extinct. Lizards were hard hit but survived to become the largest modern group of reptiles, followed closely by the snakes which had first appeared in the Cretaceous.
The field was left wide open for the survivors, before larger mammals appeared to become the dominant class on Earth. Many of these creatures themselves would die out in the following 55 million years.
Then the primates produced one hominid species who came to dominate the planet: Man. But before that first shaggy fellow took club in hand to hunt down his next meal, there were some particularly adaptive
dinosaurs that preferred survival to starving, freezing, frying or otherwise being greatly inconvenienced when that big rock came crashing down. Over the years, they also continued to evolve. And survive.
Chapter One: NEW BEGINNINGS
A young saurian walked slowly across a grassy plain. One look would determine that it was a theropod, but unlike any on current fossil records. He was only about two and a half meters from the top of his head to the ground but measured nearly five meters from nose to tail. His body was sleek, yet powerful, supporting a narrow head on a slightly elongated neck. His long, somewhat scrawny arms ended in three nimble fingers, each with a curving talon. A long, sinuous tail swept behind him in lazy zig-zag patterns. Powerful legs held him proudly above the rustling grasses. He lowered the large inner claws on his feet and dug them into the soft earth, remembering the first time he had strode across it.
The pack elders told stories of times when there had been many creatures like them. They spoke of days when there were many saurians roaming the land. But what he mostly remembered were the tales of when a great fireball had come from the heavens to eliminate the weak and make room for the strong. But surely there had been others who survived, he often thought. If there were, he intended to find them.
There had to be others out there besides the overgrown fur balls that the pack hunted. No matter how long the journey, he would find the answers to his questions. Perhaps it would be better to stay with his family but no. They had named him Gorlack, which the elders said meant 'Brave One' in the old tongue. They had given him that name for a reason. If he did not leave, who would?
He ruffled the crest of feathers running along the back of his head and down his neck in anticipation. Even if he did not learn the truth about what had become of the other saurians the elders spoke of, perhaps he would learn more about himself. He strode forward, the sun rising behind him to bring a new beginning to the land, and for him.
Chapter 2: THE NEST
Rumbling towards the rain forest was a large Styracosaur. Its mottled green-blue-purple skin flared to yellowish-red as an unknown scent came its way.
DANG! a huge green-red Utahraptor thought. Thinking about food was making him cocky enough. %$^#! Shoulda went downwind!
The Styraco laid down and uncovered her nest as a smile came to her beak. Good. Eggs alive she thought. She then went into the forest but didn't notice the slightly feathered Utahraptor slinking towards her nest.
Seemor (the Utahraptor's name) sniffed the five eggs and discovered that one was an Oviraptor egg. After eating the Styraco's eggs, parental instinct came over him. He clutched the Ovi egg and ran. The Styraco screamed in horror as she returned. Her eggs were gone! Her skin was now the color of an Element of Fire.
Chapter 3: THE LAST OF THE T.REX
Hmmmm, a small Triceratops? Yum. Supper!
thought the giant creature. His name was Jesse. It was busy eating grass, never looking up. With a deafening roar, the giant T.rex ran straight at the baby, grabbing its head and breaking its neck.
I shouldn't be disappointed but it is not like it used to be. Now, I think I am the only T.rex left. Oh, well. Here comes a Utahraptor with an egg. Better follow 'cause the mother will be chasing him and then I will kill her also. Hehehe. Jesse started to slink back into the forest.
Chapter 4: THE RAIN FOREST
The Cretaceous was supposed to be the last hurrah but the dromeosaurids had continued to evolve, well equipped with claws, muscular toothy jaws and agile bodies. Active and fierce, their intelligence was the highest among all dinosaurs and their forelimbs permitted precise manipulative functions.
Life had been under constant pressure to survive and retain its tenuous grip on the ravaged planet called Earth, yet great changes had taken place. Creatures that survived the impact harnessed unexpected properties of their bodies or the environment itself to make life easier. Intelligence, superior speed, hearing, vision, smell, claws, teeth, venom, armor, concealment; greater fecundity, changes in size, hunting cooperation and herding of prey species to increase 'sensory coverage' all were at work in the mists of the rain forest.
Some attributes, such as speed, generally plateau at a certain level because of increased energy costs but when it comes to intelligence, there is 'positive feedback' presenting an ever increasing range of options. Reptilian brains developed a few hundred million years ago where acquired knowledge exceeded genetic information. Evolution was also facilitated by a genetic mutation rate of about 10% (mostly recessive traits altered by biological function) and natural selection allowed positive traits to be reproduced and preserved. An intelligent being is also most likely to be a generalist. When the going gets tough, it is more capable of learning, remembering past strategies and being innovative, acquiring and processing new information.
Living and working in groups also has several advantages. Frequent contact with others can increase dangers but there is also opportunity to learn from them and benefit from a bright idea or avoid someone else's mistakes. Advanced cultures require the interchange of knowledge and expertise which can only be contained in many minds so it was not unusual to find a mixed pack watching the drama of life unfold. Deinonychus and Troodonids nodded approvingly from their concealment along the rain forest's edge as Seemor approached with his bounty. It was expected that the Styraco would follow and plans for it were also in place.
Chapter 5: ONE GOOD DEED
A pterosaur glided over a small river valley. She was similar to many others that have been discovered, yet different at the same time. Her beak was long and had a small fin like crest near the base and a large crest swept from the back of her head. Her body was rather compact but her wings extended
far out to either side and her tail was longer than that of most large pterosaurs.
She had been flying for hours and decided to land and rest her wings. Her graceful form angled into a slow downward spiral. After several revolutions, she alighted next to the river and lowered her beak to drink the cool water. She quickly looked up and squawked in surprise as a large form lunged from the nearby bushes.
Gorlack had traveled for several days and had yet to see another saurian. He now crested a small ridge leading into the river valley and paused to survey the area. A pterosaur was drinking from the river and he remembered the elders speaking of such creatures in their stories. He was about to call out in greeting when he noticed something moving in the bushes nearby. It was mammalian but he had not seen any others like this one. He jumped back in surprise when it sprang from its cover and began to attack the pterosaur.
Not about to let this fur ball kill the only pterosaur he had ever seen, Gorlack quickly charged at the beast and knocked it away. The mammal growled at him and jumped for his throat but Gorlack nimbly spun around and brought his tail up, swatting it back. He then leapt onto the creature's side and tore into its flesh with his large inner claws. Gorlack could feel its heartbeat weaken through his toes. Satisfied that it was no longer a threat, he turned to the pterosaur. She was looking at him somewhat nervously after her encounter with the other predator. Her wings were torn and bloody and one looked like it might have been broken but other than that, she looked healthy.
"Are you alright?" Gorlack asked, unable to think of anything else to say.
"My wings. I won't be able to fly," she said as she turned her attention to them. This fact seemed to unsettle her more than the recent attack as a slight whine escaped her beak.
"Will they be able to heal?" Gorlack queried as he studied the tears in the leathery skin.
"Yes, but I will not be able to fly until they do. And if I can't fly, I can't hunt, or escape from any more of these creatures that I may encounter." A slight tremble ran down her back at the thought of encountering more mammals. Gorlack looked at the pterosaur for a moment and perked up his crest of feathers.
"I know! Perhaps you could travel with me until your wings are better. I'm sure I could hunt down enough food for both of us and I can handle these mammals easily."
"Sounds like a reasonable offer to me," she replied and began to climb up his leg, then settled onto his back. "Try not to bounce around too much. My wings are still sore."
"Well, I can try. I'm Gorlack, by the way," he offered as he turned his head to look at her.
"I am Duriss." He chuckled at her absurd expression which looked like she was trying to say several things at the same time, teetering a bit when he stepped forward. Gorlack was soon trotting across the valley after the sun, despite her complaining chirps.
Chapter 6: ON OUTWITTING CARNIVORES - THE BASICS
I am so stupid!
Seemor's mind raced with curses. He was stupid to not have heard the T.rex's footfalls. His pack was near and he just needed to call for help. Darn! To do that, I'll hafta drop the egg! Then that blasted thing'll get it! The mom! Oh, so close, yet so far! Close but no kids!
Jesse was confused. The Utahraptor had just stopped in its tracks GRUNT, GRUNT. One thought no doubt remained in his head: Oops... In milliseconds, they were scuffling. Jesse roared in pain. Then the Styraco bellowed. After seeing a hundred Utahraptors coming to aid the one he was stalking, he slipped into a peaceful slumber.
Seemor, waiting for the Mom Styraco to charge the Rex, had set the egg down and let out an ear-piercing SCREEEEKOONNRREG! and grabbed it back in the time it took for the Styraco to charge. His mate, Grisnee, nuzzled his snout and in Raptorspeak, asked What is that egg for? To eat?. Seemor took it out of his mouth and was slightly grinning.
A Gaaaarrreeek orphan. You know them. Hide an egg in a herbivore's nest and it hatches and eats the others." At first, Grisnee was reluctant but decided to keep the ovi.
Jesse awoke hours after nightfall. If his stubby arms could reach his head, he would have scratched it. THOK!
He felt pain. Mammals!
his mind cried. His body propelled him away from the humans.
Two hundred feet above the raptor grounds sat a purple-orange-green Quetzalcoatl. A small droplet of salt water fell from her beak. Combined with that was a tear. She was Neena, the last of her species. She sobbed throughout the night.
Chapter 7: A STRANGE SIGHT TO BEHOLD
Jesse stumbled over a rock and sat down hard on the ground. Hissing laughter rather than raucous shouts followed his awkward efforts to regain his feet. His head was still throbbing as Seemor had whacked him upside the head with a haunch of Styracosaur in an effort to revive him.
"Here. You earned it." The Utahraptor left the meat and returned to his pack. Deinonychus and Troodonids also encircled the remains of the carcass, having fed while he napped. At least the gash in his side had stopped bleeding but the T.rex was still weak from loss of blood. Luckily, when the C-tops had head-butted him, no ribs were broken. Jesse looked at the wicked skull laying on the ground, now separated from the remains of the skeleton.
"The horns will be useful," a gray Troodon assured him.
"They don't taste good and break even my teeth!" Jesse preferred tender fleshy parts, not bony frills and pointy spikes. A Deinonychus came over with a long stick and raked its end on the haunch. The bone point easily sliced through the leathery hide to reveal the meat within. "Mammals have those!" Jesse backed away, having been struck by a stick thing himself. It stung but didn't penetrate his thick skin. The fleshy pests had gotten lucky and snuck up on him while he was oversated from a huge meal of dead mosasaur that had washed ashore at the Big Water.
"They make our hunt more successful. Especially against Hu-mans with sticks and rocks," a yellow eyed Troodon named Skreek eagerly nodded. Jesse had to think about all this. Saurians with stick things. And Raptors that could have had him for lunch but instead hit the Styraco when he went down. And now they were sharing their kill with him. His head REAALLY hurt now!
Chapter 8: CROSSING THE BORDER
Meanwhile, somewhere out in space:
As the sun rose, a titanic killer, worn and emaciated from months of travel, stood on a peak and surveyed her new home. Great dark blotches mottled the beast's crimson hide, breaking up the giant's outline against the rocks. Raising a six foot long skull, the behemoth tested the winds and found a gaggle of unfamiliar scents. Though hopelessly jumbled, they conveyed one important message: other hunters called this land home. The Giganotosaurus flared her upper lip, baring knife-like teeth and began
Even as she entered the great conifer forest, snaking her way about massive redwoods, the Giga forlornly recalled the southern lands she'd once claimed. There, lush tropical forests had dominated the landscape. Long-necked giants had fed her pack well and her kind had ruled by virtue of size and ferocity. But then, the Great Flame had come and spread its terrible haze across the sky. The mighty herbivores that were her natural prey had been the first to go, deprived of the plant life they needed. For a time, her pack had adapted, shifting their attentions to smaller herbivores and other hunters. Then, inevitably, those departed as well, some for the northern lands, others to the Great Beyond.
Thus, the journey had begun. One by one, starvation and infighting had claimed her comrades. The few who remained had to deal with new prey - compact, spike crowned Ceratopsians - and new rivals. The most formidable of these had been the Rexes, massive-skulled brutes that matched her species in size and sported an even deadlier bite. Indeed, a murderous "border" clash between five of these terrors and the Giga's little group had claimed her companions as well as her left arm, torn from its socket by one terrible shake of the head. Left to slowly recover and mourn her pack mates, the titan had fed on the carcasses of the fallen, then continued the hopeless trek north.
Now, here she was, seeking strange prey in unfamiliar surroundings. Odds most certainly hadn't favored her survival in the past and weren't likely to change now, unless...
Once more assailed by that bizarre scent, Chac carefully sorted out the various elements. Small hunters, relatively rare back home but apparently en masse here. Larger, sickle-clawed stalkers, again fairly scarce in the southern lands. And one Rex. Allowing a deep snarl to escape her throat, Chac followed the scent and soon came upon a vast clearing at the base of a hill. Bones littered the ground, including many Ceratopsian
skulls, the horns mysteriously absent. An odd arrangement of holes pitted the sandstone. Profoundly confused, Chac came to a reluctant conclusion: whatever else this odd pack might be, it was quite successful. Lowering her torso to the ground, the Giga rested, eyes fixed on the clearing and prepared for whatever might come next.
Back on Earth:
"Sir, the Earth is ready to be conquered!" said a Martian soldier.
"Good. We start in the morning!" their leader replied.
Jesse heard crying so he went to investigate. What he found was Neena.
"Hey, what's the matter?" he asked.
"Ahh! Get away from me!!" she screamed.
"Hey now! I won't hurt you! I promise! Now tell me what's wrong," he said to the frightened flyer.
"Well, I am the last of my race." With this said, she started to cry again.
"Then it looks like we are one in the same. You know, there are a lot of one left species and that is funny." With that, he started to laugh and so did she.
"I thought T.rexes were evil, soulless creatures..."
"Well, some are... I mean, WERE but then you have the weirdos like me."
Chapter 9: OBSERVING ODDITIES
Having lurked in the forest surrounding the odd clearing for the better part of a day, Chac had compiled the following data:
- The small and medium-sized sickle-claws (of which there were several varieties and vast numbers) did indeed work as one massive hunting/foraging pack. Judging from the fresh hadrosaur carcasses currently littering the area, this arrangement was quite beneficial for all concerned.
- The Rex, besides its status as another large carnivore and thus a rival, was perhaps not her biggest concern at the moment, inasmuch as it appeared to be mentally addled. At least, that was the conclusion Chac drew after observing the beast conversing with what turned out to be a large flier. The normal large hunter/flyer relationship consisted of said flyer picking scraps off the hunter's meals and booking it if the hunter made a wrong move. This provided no small amount of "culture shock" for the Giga. Still, the observation left Chac immensely relieved about the future prospects of a territorial "hostile takeover".
- For some reason, pointy sticks and broken horns were all the rage among the smaller hunters - and a mob of nigh hairless primates who'd stumbled upon Chac during her midday slumber. Besides the amusing squealing noises they'd made as she snapped them up, one had managed to score a direct hit with a frantically tossed spear. The resulting injury to her breastbone was less than negligible but still... Against properly sized prey, thrown weapons could be lethal.
Mentally shrugging at the unfathomability of the primate mind, Chac observed a small group of sickle-claws, including one large feather-crested example, hauling a partially eaten Pentaceratops calf into the clearing. Now, that would round out her food intake for the day nicely...
In a nearby clearing:
"Ugg. UBERGEEK, WHAT DID YOU DO?!!" screamed Angillis.
"Ummm, I tried out my time machine," replied the Spawn of Kenny meekly. Angillis looked over to see who else was present. Raptor, Gamingboy, Melkor, Queen Ghidorah and Lord Jimifulss looked around, puzzled.
"Have a clue WHEN we are?" asked Raptor as Melkor surveyed the vegetation.
"I don't think we're in Kansas anymore..." Queen Ghidorah figured, not at all happy with this development.
"Ubergeek, you did it again! You don't know anything about machinery!"
"How was I to know if this thing worked or not if I didn't try it out?" Uber whined. "You guys are no fun..."
"Been there, done that," Raptor reminded him. "Some turkey who wanted to take over the world zapped us to his dimension over on G PROJECT."
"Oh." Ubergeek hung his head in disappointment. Not one to pass up any excuse to time travel, Angillis decided to make the best of it.
"What say we have a look around? Maybe we can figure out where (and when) we are." The little company decided to do so and thoughts of searching for suitable shelter soon began growing in their minds. From what they had seen, it looked like it was going to rain soon. They were grumpy already, especially Lord Jimifulss and Queen Ghidorah. The landscape was grim and forlorn, with withered and weathered trees surrounding them, adding to the occasional chill that traveled up more than one spine. They walked for what seemed like many moons, guided only by the pale light overhead.
Melkor had been puzzled for the last few hours as the ground was littered with oddly-shaped craters that seemed to follow a curvilinear pattern. In fact, if examined closely, it seemed as if they were all around them. Their exhaustion grew and in the blink of an eye, they were soon fast asleep, fallen branches and twigs serving as their beds and blankets for the now cold group huddled under a tree. It had also started raining.
Melkor suddenly awoke as the rain had stopped, the water filling a noticeable gap in the ground. His tired, weary eyes analyzed the pool of life and he smiled, taking up a big handful of the rainwater. The group had not drunk a fair amount of water all day and he guessed how well the grumpy Lord Jimi and Queen Ghidorah would greet this new development. Melkor woke them and everyone was soon happily lapping away at the pool. Gamingboy was reluctant at first but couldn't deny his thirst much longer. Soon, he also was bent on all fours, scooping the liquid like a ravished dog. Lord Jimi was smiling again, his sheer nuttiness
slowly seeping back into his mind. Raptor sat quietly back in the shelter of the tree as it started to rain again, filling the depression once more. Melkor hesitated for a moment when it seemed like he saw a light in the distance. He finally dismissed it as a trick his mind was playing on him. Thunder rolled as the sky was brewing up another storm. Raptor suggested they all get further within the hollow of the gigantic tree trunk. The rain soon poured down in a cloudburst. Lightning illuminated the now completely darkened sky as thunder shook the earth.
Melkor was worried, his attention once again drawn to the pool of water, though this time it looked like the grim pool of death as ripples began to appear.
"I think we should just stay here and wait for the storm to end," suggested Jimi, slightly nervous himself.
"Not a chance! As soon as we find Ubergeek, the sooner we can kick his butt!" screamed Gamingboy, half jokingly.
"Will you guys just shut up? I'm trying to get some rest here!!! shouted Queen Ghidorah. The rest of them stood up, looking at Melkor who suddenly had a horrified expression on his face. Even Raptor became a bit uneasy. The bickering stopped, at least for a while.
"Guys... I have a bad feeling about this place. I think we should get out of here." His companions scoffed at the idea of going out in the rain, telling him to get some sleep. Maybe they were right. It had been nearly a day since he had last eaten a full meal. The last time that had happened, he supposedly had some hallucinations. Melkor dismissed it all with a hearty laugh and finally went to sleep although the storm was still raging.
The next morning, feeling more revitalized than one would expect, the group decided to have a proper look around. All that night, everyone claimed to have heard the screams of dying people, yet all of them save Melkor gave no further thought to it. He had also heard the sounds but thought they were mere hallucinations. A shout suddenly interrupted his thoughts as Raptor had found a way out of the jungle. They were grateful for her discovery and talking excitedly of the glimmer of civilization she had seen until Queen Ghidorah bumped into a woman. She stumbled and cursed as her head hit a rock. The stranger kindly apologized and offered to treat her wound.
"Emiko!" called an authoritative yet dignified sounding Japanese man's voice.
"Coming, father!" she yelled back but before she got a chance to run to him, Lord Jimi, ever being the ladies man, politely got her attention.
"Excuse me, ma'am, but would you mind telling us where we are?" he asked.
"Why, no. We are on Odo Island."
"And what year is it?" asked Melkor. She looked at him strangely.
"Why, it is 1954..." An American, likely in his forties, came running to her, beads of sweat trickling down his now red face.
"Emiko, your father has been looking for you for half an hour now. Would you please come join us?" He then noticed her associates. "Oh, visitors. I'm Steve Martin." The man offered his hand and each of them shook it as if he were the last person on Earth. Emiko explained the details of their situation to Mr. Martin and after a final handshake, she headed off with him.
"One last question, though," shouted Lord Jimi. "What are you all doing here?"
"We're investigating the discovery of a lifetime! The natives say it was a monster that ruined their village last night. And I'm here to prove it," Martin explained. "The storm we had was nothing more than the wrath of the beast whom these villagers fear so much." Martin was as grim as ever, fear coating every word he said.
"And what is this monster's name?" asked Queen Ghidorah, intrigued and horrified at the same time. Martin slowly turned to face them. His visage was one of fear, now as pale as the moon that had been their companion the night before. His eyes glowered while Emiko chose to sob silently.
"The natives call him Gojira." And with that, Martin and Emiko left them. The little company soon followed their path and came to the ruined village, the aura of doom and dread still prevailing over the horror-stricken natives.
Chapter 10: GREAT BALLS OF CONFUSION
A bewildering backstory of some 14 hours ago:
"Does anyone know where Uber and Angillis went off to?" asked Lord Jimi.
"Does it look like I know?" demanded Gamingboy. Suddenly, in a big flash of light, Angillis, Ubergeek, Jesse, Neena and Seemor appeared. Everyone just gaped at them.
"Okay, now where is Gojira?" asked Jesse and as odd as it may seem, everyone understood him!
"Uhh, did a T.rex just TALK?!" asked Queen G.
"He's right behind us, isn't he?" asked Seemor.
Gaping at the scene before him, a certain Spawn of Kenny contemplated just how royally he'd managed to mess things up this time. It seemed like only seconds ago, he'd been seeing the sights of the Ogasawara Daikaiju Preserve (better known to the public as "Monster Island" but if one wanted to get technical, the complex encompassed several islands).
"Yo, Geek! Do I need to put a leash on you?!" Uber's tour guide and traveling companion, Miyako Aso, rolled her eyes as the gangly gaijin finally peeled his gaze away from a sedated King Ghidorah.
"Actually, that's not such a bad idea..." Uber sauntered up with a crooked leer and was promptly cuffed upside the head.
"Maybe later. C'mon. The boss wants a look at that bit of Futurian junk you've been tinkering with." And with that, the two presented the Geekspawn's latest technological terror to Dr. Kyoko Manabe, head of the Ogasawara facility.
"Soo... In effect, you've managed to hotwire this motherboard from the remains of Mecha Ghidorah into a functioning time travel device?" Ubergeek winced.
"To be honest, the functioning part remains to be seen. I've currently got the sucker hooked up to a cold fusion generator, which should theoretically allow it to be powered by raw matter. The thing is, without the proper surge protector... boom."
"Boom?" A raised eyebrow. Beside him, Miyako snorted.
"Boom. That, and the setting's currently stuck on 65,000,000 B.C. Nothing I've tried has worked so I was hoping to enlist the services of some of your R&D guys. That M-11 chap in particular might be able to wrap his mind around this. With your go-ahead, of course, Madam Director."
"Well, this seems to be your lucky day, Mr. Kenny-"
"Oh, give it a rest, Sean. That has got to be the goofiest handle I've ever heard." Miyako snorted.
"We would be happy to help you out, given your part in assisting our best wrangler." At this, Uber's companion draped an arm across his shoulder, which the Geekspawn reluctantly shook off. "That, and those cell samples you two provided. The Bioengineering section is going positively berserk about the whole thing. Gojira/human hybrids. Talk about your brave new world. Ah! Here's M-11 now." The 6'-7" android, having materialized from seemingly nowhere, stood at attention.
"You called, Madam Director?"
"Yes. Now, if you could take a look at Mr. Kenny's little science project..."
"REEEAAREEEUUUUUURRRRRR!" Hoisting an immense taser to her shoulder, Miyako spun in the direction the terrible roar had come from.
"Probably that buggering Baragon again! You'd think the thing would learn its lesson! Excuse me..." Unfortunately, as Ms. Aso performed her about-face, the taser happened to catch Uber upside the head, knocking the time travel device from his grasp. The Geekspawn dove for his latest toy with a muffled "$@##!" and caught it on the first bounce. However, the jolt had been more than enough... FREEEEEOOOOOOOW! and when the eldritch light cleared, Miyako, M-11 and Director Manabe were left gaping at the blank space previously occupied by the Spawn of Kenny.
Which left our favorite(?) were-Kaiju in the awkward position between a gaggle of what resembled honest-to-god Utahraptors and a huge crimson battle-scarred mean-as-hell Giganotosaurus. Chac was the first to recover from the shock of the hairless primate's appearance.
"RHAAAERRRRRRRRRNNNH!" Raptors, Seemor and Geekspawn scattered. Chac scanned the clearing, grunted contentedly and tore into the Pentaceratops carcass left behind.
Meanwhile, Ubergeek had run across several fellow Kaijuphiles who had apparently been randomly snatched up by his malfunctioning device and weren't too happy about the situation. As far as Uber was concerned, they could join the crowd. On the bright side, the setting had finally changed - to 1954, of all times. The Geekspawn's deliberation ran thusly:
"Eh, twentieth century... Close enough." Pressing the Big Red Button®, Uber had a moment to glimpse several large theropods eying the group in a curious (ie. non-hungry) manner just before the world twisted into a Hellish Kaleidoscope™ for the umpteenth time that day. And thus had events run their course. One deranged were-kaiju, several of his web mates and at least three Cretaceous relics were now stuck on, of all places, Odo Island, the birthplace of a Monster King. Uber assessed the situation coolly, snatched up a nearby coconut and promptly bonked himself over the head, turning his brain off for several blissful hours as roughly 50 years into the future, the Ogasawara Island staff readied a battle battered machine.
Meanwhile, back on Odo Island:
"Mr. Pope, are you quite sure the old girl is up to this trip? We're still not finished with the repairs," a concerned technician queried.
"It'll have to do, son. Unless you'd prefer we left our boy Kenny hanging and he ended up nuking the universe trying to get back?" With that, the old man turned to his co-pilot. "Ready, Ms. Aso?"
"Let's do this."
Angillis grabbed the time machine thingy from Ubergeek and whacked him upside the head.
"Every time you touch this thing, something bad happens!" he hissed, keeping an eye on the dinos before them.
"What's a Gojira?" the Geek asked Jesse, not seeming to realize he was talking to a T.rex. Seemor wasn't too impressed with the humans while Neena continued to stare at them.
"Gojira is the key to our survival." Jesse indicated his two companions. "And possibly every dinosaur left in the world."
G-cells, Ubergeek thought to himself. So that's why Doctor Manabe wanted them so bad... He had put the Geekspawn at great risk to retrieve some from the site of a monster rampage. Nobody ever seemed to give him the WHOLE story since the day he applied for a custodial job at the Ogasawara Daikaiju Preserve. The Geek had soon developed a particularly good rapport with every creature at the research station and Miyako Aso had made note of this. She found ways to utilize his strange talents, making him her "special helper". The pay stunk but he pretty much had the run of the place and didn't have to clean up after the Gyaos anymore. During one of his exploratory meanderings about the facility, he discovered a hangar full of "junk" (one of his favorite things). Thus, the "time machine", even though he was hoping to build a combination ham radio and video game.
"Some game this turned out to be..." the Geekspawn fretted as the reptiles eyed him expectantly. The predators were beginning to suspect something. For several minutes, they kept quiet as the Geekspawn recalled that classic line from JURASSIC PARK. He was bored and wanted nothing more than to go to sleep. One of the Rexes roared, startling him. By some divine intervention, the two gigantic theropods left and found a clearing for themselves to take a nap. Uber breathed a sign of relief. Whew! For a second there, I thought those things were gonna eat me! His instincts telling him to run, Ubergeek flew from the area of the sleeping predators, hoping to finally escape their leering, curious gazes. He picked up speed but his terrified eyes didn't catch sight of the puddle ahead. And with that, Ubergeek fell, hitting his head on the ground. Dazed and tired as ever, he let nature take its course and he blacked out.
The Geekspawn awoke, feeling the welcome warmth of a bonfire on his cheek. He let out a huge yawn and found himself in some sort of crude shelter. Bolting out of his makeshift bed, he realized immediately that this must be his fellow Kaijuphiles' sanctuary. He called out to them one by one but it seemed they were gone. Nevertheless, Ubergeek continued yelling, all the while feeling a dread paranoia seeping within him.
"Hello? Anybody home? Raptor? Melkor? Lord Jimi?" He increased his shouting, getting ever more frantic by the second. He drew in a deep breath and yelled with all his might. "Heh. That outta wake 'em up." His calls were answered by a series of bellows and Uber shuddered, thinking it might be those two T.rexes again. With slow light steps, he started to back away, fearing an assault from two of the most powerful predators that ever existed. A cold sweat fell from his brow. He seemed to be under a tree, albeit a very rubbery and warm one. Ubergeek froze as he realized the obvious. A huge, six foot long head hovered above in a menacing manner with sharp, knife-like teeth bared for all to see. Acidic saliva fell down his back as he noticed the beast's crimson hide. It must have been nearly 50 feet long, indeed larger than any Rex discovered so far. The beast roared, extinguishing the fire that had awoken Ubergeek. His ears pounded from the horrible noise of the Giganotosaurus carolinii he was standing beneath. The Giga roared again and proceeded to chase the tiny human it called prey. Ubergeek ran desperately as those gigantic jaws nearly made a meal of him. Chac roared, awakening every living creature presently on the island. The villagers
trembled, fearing it was their legendary Gojira. Chac stopped, allowing the Geekspawn to escape to a nearby hedge, fatigued by his many miles of running just as something pulled him into the bushes.
"Shh... be quiet, Ubergeek," Raptor cautioned, which momentarily gave the Geekspawn a welcome sense of relief. The others were there, too. The echo of Chac's roar resounded again, causing their hearts to stop beating for a moment. But like a scared animal, the Giga ran away, seemingly terrified of a higher presence nearby.
"He been chasing you guys, too?" asked Ubergeek.
"No, but the Rexes were," replied Melkor. Their joking continued for five more minutes until a great, yellow lightning bolt hit the northern hill, causing trees, hedges and houses to blaze.
"Must be another storm," figured Lord Jimi. The wind blew hard, like a hurricane. More thunderbolts played across the sky, defying the laws of physics by striking in a direct path as the thunder rolled.
"Odd..." figured Uber. "I've seen lightning bolts go horizontal before but not completely level. And these are powerful, too..." His musings were interrupted by an ungodly shriek which caused panic among the superstitious villagers. The hills echoed with a sound that threatened to split them asunder. Queen Ghidorah looked up at the sky as an ear-splitting shriek drew everyone's attention upward. Lord Jimi caught her limp body as she fainted from some unimaginable shock. A huge rip in the sky, like a window to another world, pulsated with unheard of energies. Ubergeek's time machine seemed to have brought a new guest, one famed for its destruction and butchery of countless worlds. Its unsurpassed power had no equal in the universe. The triple cackle resounded once more, echoing like the war cries of the lords of Hell.
Grand King Ghidorah sent a lance of terror up everyone's spine. The beast would surely annihilate this pathetic spot of ground soon.
Chapter 11: THE AWAKENING
Once more coolly assessing the situation, Ubergeek turned to Melkor.
"You wouldn't, by any chance, still have that Middle Earth artifact I dug up for you a while back?"
"Uh... I sold that on eBay a month ago," was Melkor's sheepish response.
"Well, on to Plan B then. Get everyone under cover and see what you can do to warn the villagers."
"Sounds good. Eh... Uber. Why are you walking towards the Apocalyptic Space Dragon™?" He turned back toward his comrade and a Semi-Dramatic Flash o' Lightning© was reflected in glowing yellow eyes. Ubergeek replied in a rapidly deepening voice:
"Because here's where I fix things, starting with that." Turning back to the hovering, cackling demon, he began the Shift. His comrades, having had no prior knowledge of the Geekspawn's dual nature, were treated to a terrifying sight as flesh transmutated into blackened scale and talons sprouted from fingertips. A massive tail uncurled itself and Uber began growing. Pulses of heat lightning rained from the darkening sky and were absorbed into the changing shape, redoubling its expansion. Finally, the thing stabilized at roughly 300 feet. Night abruptly became day as a crimson flare rippled across jagged dorsal fins and a burst of atomic hellfire slashed the heavens, burning into King Ghidorah's right wing root. With an ungodly warbling shriek of rage, the golden dragon spiraled from the air, its impact rocking the island. Six pairs of wicked reptilian eyes scanned the landscape and fixated on their attacker. Overjoyed at the prospect of a true challenge, Grand Ghidorah howled an ululating battle cry, promising death and pain. Ubergeek responded with a curl of the lip, baring fangs.
"Let's dance." Ghidorah wasted no time in obliging. Lances of gravitic firepower erupted from the leering maws, shredding the landscape as they snaked toward their target which disappeared in a physics-defying leap and crashed down atop the dragon moments later. Throwing his weight into Grand Ghidorah's center head, Ubergeek managed a rough headlock and bent the neck back, hoping to hear the snap of fragmenting vertebrae.
Not one to be so easily subdued, Grand Ghidorah bent his outer necks inward and flayed the were-Kaiju's back with a point-blank gravitic barrage. Ichor and loose scales jetted into the sky as the Geekspawn slackened his grip and was flung bodily into the surf, vanishing in a massive eruption of foam. King Ghidorah unloaded a full gravitic salvo onto the spot, raising still more foam before pausing to assess his work. Apparently satisfied, he cackled victoriously as he turned back for the island. Rising slowly into the air, the demon headed for the village.
"Well, that sucked," mused a disgusted Gamingboy. His comrades more or less muttered assent and nearly jumped out of their skins as Grand Ghidorah's enraged cackle once more shredded the night air, only to be drowned out by a horribly familiar bellow.
Gojira - the original Gojira - loomed menacingly at the village's eastern outskirts. For the first time in centuries, Grand Ghidorah sensed the presence of a force matching his own. He cackled with glee at the sport this night promised. Ubergeek chose this moment to make his reappearance, erupting from the surf behind the golden dragon and tackling it to the ground. Utterly unprepared for the strike, Ghidorah took his time getting up, which left Gojira and his shapeshifting "descendant" time to look one another over.
Having come to a decision, the two monstrosities unleashed a fusillade of atomic flame, forcing Grand Ghidorah back several steps as directly overhead, yet another space/time rift opened with the customary Blinding Flash©, discharging what resembled yet another Ghidorah. This demon, however, was mechanical in nature, which quickly became evident as its metallic war shriek sounded. Within the cockpit, two of Ogasawara's finest surveyed the scenario.
"Hm... looks like ol' Kenny found a buddy," mused Pope. Having performed a double take at the sight of Grand Ghidorah and an encore upon noticing Gojira, Miyako quickly collected her wits.
"Mr. Pope, you think you can handle this bird alone?"
"Of course, m'lady! But why?" Willing her own Shift to begin, Aso unhooked herself from the co-pilot's seat, displaying a freshly grown set of talons.
"They're gonna need all the help they can get." With that, she dashed for the evacuation capsule, leaving Pope to shake his head and power up the targeting sensors.
Below, Grand Ghidorah blitzed the area with gravitic death. Ubergeek leaped out of the way but Gojira, lacking such agility, took the punishing bolts with a grunt of irritation. Leaning into the attack, the Monster King began a lumbering charge, pulverizing foliage and huts underfoot. Turning back, the Geekspawn prepared to hit Ghidorah from the side and only then did he notice Mecha Ghidorah II hovering above
the battlefield. A pinprick of light jetted from the Mech's back and seemed to burst in midair, freeing a rapidly expanding shape.
"About time she got here." Landing with a tooth jarring impact, the form resolved itself as a third Godzillasaur, this one sharing Uber's agile build, albeit a full head taller and sporting much reduced dorsals. The apparition spared a moment to glare at her companion before turning to Grand Ghidorah. Encircled by three mountains of spine, fang and claw, he experienced a moment of trepidation, then burning agony as all three Gojirae raked him with atomic fury. From the heavens, Mecha Ghidorah II opened fire itself, adding a hail of projectiles and energy to the conflagration.
From a mountain shelter, the Odo Islanders and Raptor's merry band gaped at the battle royale shaping up. Lord Jimifulss soon called from from the back of the hut.
"Popcorn's ready." His partners greeted the news with several slaps on the back. Everyone happily dug in, indifferent to the fighting behemoths below them. Queen Ghidorah was still unconscious, and thankfully so because if she ever found out they had been eating her favorite food without including her... The sound of crunching echoed across the upper part of the hill, nearly drowning out the hideous war cries of the fighting Kaiju until Melkor spoke.
"Where the hell did you get that, Jimi?" he asked, quite curious but thankful at the same time.
"It's my mom. She never lets me leave home without microwave popcorn," Lord Jimi replied with a sheepish grin. He stared back at the gaping faces of his comrades. "Uhh... more popcorn?" Everyone eagerly awaited the next batch.
"Hmm... needs a little salt," Gamingboy muttered while munching away.
Below, Grand Ghidorah struggled to keep up with his opponents, pride swelling deep within him. How could he possibly lose to a species which he had gladly feasted on so long ago? The thought crossed his mind, giving newfound strength. A bellow that sounded like the eruption of a thousand volcanoes escaped his triple maw, catching his opponents off guard. Time seemed to slow down as all three Gojis™ considered their opponent for a fleeting second. Gojira snarled malevolently at the dragon, baring a row of bone-crushing teeth. Fangs dripped with the beast's radioactive saliva, burning several patches in the now rent ground. He bellowed back, sending anew his challenge to this destroyer of worlds as the group up the hill continued their little picnic. Gojira grunted, his eyes turning as pale as the light of the moon. A spectral light grew in the beast's cavernous jaws, illuminating it with a fell light. Air fizzled out where it was near the glowing luminescence. Dorsal plates began to glow with the same supernatural light, melting rock and boulder within a distance of a hundred feet. Great lances of radioactive power danced along the monster's jagged fins.
Gojira opened his mouth and released a stream of white-hot sunfire, stabbing into the golden dragon's belly. Ghidorah screamed in pain as the beam ruptured his scales, cooking the organs housed within his vile
interior. Golden-hued skin flew away while some burned in bubbling pools of charred flesh. Holes were rent upon the dragon, burning away skin and exposing the now roasted innards of Ghidorah, the beast starting to salivate pools of its own blood and organs. Molten slag, once skin and bone, started dripping freely onto the ground. Ghidorah's taloned feet dug in, creating tremendous furrows as far as the eye could see as a crater started to form below him. Gojira did not hold back and continued his barrage for two more minutes, the stench of blood urging him to continue his sadistic attack. The beast then halted and redirected the beam onto the ground. Centuries-old earth, hallowed by the customs and rituals of the island's inhabitants, gave way to a massive crater large enough for the tricephaloid monster to fit into. Ghidorah fell down more than fifty feet. The exhausted dragon's mind told him to rest and three pair of eyes closed, seemingly for good. Gojira roared once more, the sound of victory spreading into the four winds for all the Earth to heed. He roared again and blasted his opponent with the full strength of his beam.
Ubergeek stared in amazement. Clearly, this Gojira was powerful, perhaps even moreso than the golden dragon whom Earth and Mothra feared so much. He and Miyako talked for a moment. Gojira was going to die.
On top of the hill, Melkor stared down in amazement at the fight he had just witnessed. His eyes were wide with fear and so were those of his comrades.
"Damn! Ubergeek really screwed up this time," he muttered to himself as Gojira stomped forward, determined to destroy the two creatures that so closely resembled him. With a sadistic grin, he began to charge up for his attack, the two were-Gojis™ doing likewise. They would die by his claws and he would cast their entrails into the four winds while he gnawed their roasted flesh. Gojira walked forward,
leaving the crater and his charred opponent behind but a great golden light suddenly erupted upward. Gojira sneered back, sending another knife of thermonuclear fury stabbing into the crater. In a burst of energy, the horrible, mocking triple laugh of Grand King Ghidorah echoed across the island. A great figure, shining like the golden dawn and bristling with unparalleled energy floated out of the crater. Ghidorah was back and angrier than ever. Gojira snarled back and with a final bellow, began to charge for another attack that would make the atom bomb, indeed a whole group of them, utterly inferior to his strength and power.
Melkor froze, looking at the newly revitalized Ghidorah. The dragon flexed its wings and Melkor fell on his back, hitting the ground hard. Gamingboy offered him hand up.
"You alright, Melkor?"
"Yeah, though I think I landed on something hard... *OUCH!* A rock, maybe?" He reached back and started to massage his back but felt something heavy and hard. It seemed to have fallen so he looked around, determined to throw whatever caused his pain at the battlefield below. When he found it, a large smile started to form on his lips. "Ubergeek will love this," he muttered. Melkor ran down to the battlefield, the efforts of his fellow Kaijuphiles™ unable to stop him from charging wildly off like a madman. Taking a look back, his comrades were shouting furiously so he gave them a reassuring smile and hurried to where Ubergeek was.
The Middle Earth eldritch artifact hadn't been auctioned on eBay after all. With the male were-Gojira in sight, Melkor started calling his name. Ubergeek roared and smiled back at him. They had some hope after all, even if it was but a mere glimmer.
Jimi stared awestruck at the battle taking place before him. "...Damn..."
"I say, hello!"
"Not now! Go away, damn you!"
"Is that any way to talk to an old friend?"
"Friend my butt! All you ever do is show up and chatter at me whenever something interesting happens. Now will you please go away? I'm trying to make some more popcorn."
"Popcorn is bad for you. You know that, don't you?"
"Dammit, Perry! Can't you just lay off for once? See? Look at that! Everyone's already noticed you!" Jimi pointed at the group of webmates, all of whom were staring at him with their best "WTF?" looks. He paced back and forth as he yelled at himself. His Geta clogs made loud Clok! sounds as he stomped about.
"Uh, Jimi? Are you OK, man?" Gamingboy asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Of course I'm OK! It's Perry! That damn rabbit won't shut up!"
"P... Perry?" everyone asked at once.
"Oh wait. Are you hearing voices again?"
"They're not voices! It's a rabbit! He lives in my head and he-"
"Oh, Jimi, you fool! Now they'll be sure to nail you to that tree over there! I told you not to tell them about me!"
"Leave me alone!" The group considered asking further questions but their minds were suddenly elsewhere as another huge explosion rattled the earth, knocking them to the ground.
Having spent the last several seconds goggling at the ungodly firepower displayed by the Genuine Article™, the two were-Gojis© took a moment to notice the speck at their feet. Bending down, Ubergeek squinted.
"Yeah... About that artifact. Seems it merely slipped out of my back pocket. I was thinking of that 6" Marmit Hedorah when I said I sold it on eBay..."
"And this is somehow relevant because---?" Miyako, attempting to call Uber's attention back to the current situation at hand, was forced to spring back as Grand Ghidorah's renewed gravitic barrage raked the area. Thankfully, Gojira's return blast floored the tricephalic demon, keeping both horrors occupied for a moment.
"Because this particular artifact happens to be..." Uber attempted to pronounce a word in the long extinct Valar tongue and failed miserably. "Oh hell! In English, it's the Heart of the Black."
"Ancalagon the Black. Only the most badass dragon ever to blight the planet."
"Yes," Melkor finished. "Thing is, the Heart requires some intense heat to unlock its power which would allow the user to wield Ancalagon's powers for a couple hours. Beyond that, there's the risk of reviving Anc's spirit."
"Which would be a Bad Thing®," Uber further explained.
"Oookay." Obviously skeptical, Miyako glanced back at the battle and winced as Ghidorah rammed its mechanical doppleganger, sending both dragons crashing to the ground. Gojira spared the three an evil look before moving in on the tangled terrors. "Well, let's get on with it."
"Indeed." With that, Melkor clutched the Heart of the Black™ to his chest and Uber bathed his comrade in the Atom Fire®. In a semi-theatric manner, black flame curled up about Melkor's form. Rising into a great pillar, the eldritch blaze caught Grand Ghidorah's attention as he sent Gojira stumbling back. An apprehensive expression crawled across all his three faces. Abruptly, the black flame exploded outward, revealing a terrible form. Great bat-like wings spread, a good thousand feet between their tips. A triple-pronged tail thrashed furiously, gouging great rents in the earth. Cloven hooves raked the dirt underfoot and rearing back, a bristling mass of horn and fangs that only by the broadest definition could be called a face gaped wide and released a terrible roar. Miyako and Ubergeek stepped back in awe. Grand Ghidorah, struggling to his feet, let out another cackle, this one with a hint of fear. Gojira bared teeth. Yet another foe for him to shred. In Mecha Ghidorah II's cockpit, Pope whistled.
Back at the mountain shelter, Queen Ghidorah, awakened at last by Ancalagon's roar, snatched the bag of popcorn from Jimi's rigid grasp.
His Creepy Intro® finished, Melkor spared a moment to analyze his new form. "B!##$in'." And with that, the battle renewed. Collecting himself, Grand Ghidorah rocketed into the night sky, shrieking his fury. Pumping his wings, Ancalagon the Black lunged to meet him. The dragons clashed in a terrible blur of beating wings, slashing talons, whipping tails and rending fangs.
On the ground, a battered Mecha Ghidorah II's commander sized up the situation and fired up the Kaiju Clamp®, snagging a surprised Gojira from behind. With the Monster King© pinned in place, Miyako took the opportunity to hammer Gojira with a supercharged atomic beam, blasting a smoking crater in the horror's chest and eliciting a howl of rage. Ubergeek, for his part, scanned the fight above for an opening and found it as both dragons backed off for a respite. He leaped, hitting Ghidorah at waist level and locked his arms about the demon with a rib crushing grip, simultaneously activating an Atomic Pulse™. The combination stunned El Ghidorah Grande®, sending both Daikaiju crashing to earth.
As Gojira wrestled furiously with the Clamp, attempting to turn and ravage his mechanical assailant, Mecha Ghidorah II maintained a steady hail of point-blank energy blasts, keeping his target disoriented.
Meanwhile, Miyako tore into the earth underfoot and started burrowing a rough circle, opening a sizable pit below Gojira. Mere yards away, Ubergeek quickly leaped aside as Ancalagon bathed the fallen Ghidorah
with hellfire. The Geekspawn rapidly added his own flame to the festivities and was rewarded with a cackle of agony.
Back at the cave, Lord Jimi continued to argue with his invisible "friend", Perry. Rolling her eyes, Raptor turned to continue her conversation with Seemor and Gamingboy. The Odo Islanders, for their part, let out a
"Not another monster."
"Okay that's it! I have brought the cavalry!" yelled Angillis. With him were the aliens, the dinos and even Anguirus! "Okay, everyone choose your creature and join the fun!" he ordered as he rode Anguirus into battle.
"I am not even going to ask," said Gamingboy.
"Come on, kill all of them! You know you want to! Hey, Jimi, did you say something?" called Angillis.
"You can hear Perry too?!" he asked.
The Great Dinosaur Army™, led by Gorlack, Seemor, Jesse and Chac (who, admittedly, was fighting the urge to rip her fellow hunters' throats out) let out a great bellow as they beheld their champions locked in mortal combat with the Golden Devourer®. Justice would be served this day. Anguirus was overjoyed to see three mighty Godzillas, as well as a machine of some sort, beating on a hated enemy. Letting out a barking roar, he charged into the fray. Angillis, despite his best efforts to hold on, was sent flying. Luckily, Miyako's claw/eye coordination was finely tuned enough to catch him and muttered something about "Friggin' psychos! Where does Uber dig these freaks up?" and deposited him safely on the ground before returning to the battle.
The Odo Islanders let out a collective groan at the appearance of yet another Daikaiju, as well as a horde of beings capable of using them as finger food. The Martians, deprived of their space armadas and Death Rays©, simply goggled at the chaos.
"Uh, Supreme Commander... Isn't that King Ghidorah? I thought he was busy subjugating Sector E."
Lord Jimi greeted the extraterrestrial beings. "Want some popcorn?"
"Earth creature... we know not how in the seven hells we were brought to this infernal plane. Of course we will partake of your 'popcorn', as well as any inebriants you may have with you."
"Join the crowd, bro!" Gamingboy held up his flask of Night Train©.
Ubergeek, Miyako, Pope, Melkor and Gojira looked on, bemused, as Anguirus sprang into the air, curled into a spiky sphere and slammed into a prone Grand Ghidorah, raising sheets of ichor as the murderous carapace flayed golden scales from hide. Encouraged by the spiny saurian's example, all five settled their various differences and dog-piled the tricephalic terror.
"Hey, uh guys! How do you like my new pet?" asked James D, who somehow appeared with Gamera.
"Um... where did Angillis get off to?" asked Jimi, who was handing out popcorn. Somewhere deep inside his mind was a battle between Angillis and Perry.
Get out of my slave's head!
NO! First you DIE!
Back at the battle, the army of dinos attacked, along with everyone else. The Great Dinosaurian Offensive lasted for roughly the time needed for the less intelligent dinos to decipher the fact that the largest of them came up to Grand Ghidorah's kneecaps. With that sad reality processed, the Saurian Swarm© noted the appearance of a Giant Turtle From Hell™ and wisely beat feet for the mountain shelter which became very crowded very quickly. Jimi would have offered Seemor, Gorlack & Co. some popcorn but he was unconscious after Raptor, tiring of his valiant narrative against the rabbit in his head, applied a primitive sedative (a rock) to his noggin. Queen Ghidi took over his Goodwill Munchie Duties®.
James D let Gammy loose to do what he did best. The Guardian of the Universe™ scanned his possible targets and settled on the Destroyer of Worlds™, with the King of Monsters® running a close second. For a moment, Gamera considered simply unleashing the might of raw Mana®, then decided on a simple Plasma Fireball barrage. Given a brief breather as his assailants noted Gamera's arrival, Ghidorah was quick to respond, picking off two fireballs with precise gravitic blasts, only to take the third directly in his middle face. Charred a solid black, the head snapped back and that was all the opening the two were-Gojis needed as they lunged in for the kill. Ubergeek hit low, throwing a scaly shoulder into Grand Ghidorah's right side. Miyako hit high, springing straight into the clustered necks with an Atomic Pulse. The eruption of azure energy set the golden dragon's remaining heads reeling and Miyako, heavier and more powerful than her male counterpart, succeeded where Uber had failed, locking her fanged jaws about the center throat and surging back over the demon's shoulders, such as they are. Vertebrae gave way with a sickening set of pops. Grand Ghidorah's massive frame stiffened and toppled as Miyako rolled free. For one terrible moment, the Devourer© spasmed in agony, fiery eyes glazing over and then he lay still. As one, three Gojirae, one mecha, one dragon and one Guardian unloaded an ungodly barrage of energy upon the fallen destroyer. When the smoke cleared, a charred husk was all that remained of Grand Ghidorah. Throwing her muzzle back, Miyako bared bloodstained fangs to the night sky and the earth shook with her victorious roar. After a moment, Ancalagon, Gojira, Gamera, Anguirus and an oddly compelled Ubergeek followed suit.
Which left two were-Gojis, one mechanical monstrosity, one carnivorous Anklyosaurus, one eldritch dragon, one Monster King©, and one Atlantean Bio-Weapon™ to consider what the hell to do with one another.
"DIE, PERRY, DIE!" Bonk!
A little afterward, Angillis showed up with a very dead rabbit in his hands. "Hmm, guys. We can go home now."
"But there's just one problem. What are we going to do with them?" asked Uber, pointing toward the army of dinos, aliens and kaiju.
"Meet my new pets!!!" yelled Angillis but before that idea could go any further, Perry came back to life and grew to the size of the King of the Monsters but sadly, his powers only went so far once dislodged from Lord Jimi's head. And even super-sized, he was Only A Bunny Rabbit®, and not the Monty Python Type™ either. Once the flying fur settled, those of a carnivorous bent among the vast army of Daikaiju, dinos, islanders, E.T.s and Kaijuphiles were faced with enough Roast Rabbit© to keep them fed for weeks, assuming they could resolve the teeny problem of a disgruntled Monster King.
As Ubergeek, Miyako, Anguirus, Mecha Ghidorah II and Gamera faced off with Gojira, Melkor reverted to human form, pocketed the Heart of the Black® and stared back and forth from the rabbit to Jimi.
"Sooo... How long was that thing in your head again?" Their joking continued until all of a sudden, a horrible roar split the air. The company looked up in shock at the sight they beheld. Ancalagon was back, his spirit set loose by the rabid blood lust he had for Ghidorah. Melkor was afraid it would be permanent and had a quick dialogue with Ubergeek, explaining their situation. The Geekspawn cursed and slowly transformed back into Goji form. They may have gotten rid of Ghidorah but here was a threat ten times more dangerous. And powerful. Ubergeek looked up and noticed a large ball of energy beginning to form.
"Guys... I think we have a big problem here." Angillis jumped at the beast, only to be eaten. Everyone who was over 50 meters tall started to attack the Dragon.
"Hey, what did I miss?" asked Angillis.
"Um, I thought I just saw you get eaten!??"
"How did you...?"
"Do you really want to know?"
"NO!" Then for some reason, the black dragon turned into a rabbit/dragon combination.
"I will never die!" yelled Peter the Black. Ancalagon roared and in a blink of an eye, he was back to his normal dragon self. Enraged, he called out the bunny rabbit's spirit, who was now cowering in fear. Ancalagon opened his mouth and released a stream of pure, nihilistic energy at the ghost. The specter
screamed and all of a sudden, he was gone. Never was he created nor will he exist in the centuries to come, in all realms, lands, dimensions, universes and possibilities, erased from the memory of the gods themselves. Ancalagon looked down at the pathetic bunch and in a second, the thundering sky above them burst into life and with the fury of the Black Dragon, started to ravage the already defiled land.
"Well, @#@#$# of a #$#$#$ing #$#$@!!" snarled Miyako. "Can't we get any peace around this madhouse??" The answer, of course, would be 'No' and Ms. Aso was shortly rewarded for her arresting outbursts with a blast of Hellfire™, c/o Ancalagon the Black. The flames would have reduced any normal human to charcoal but were-Gojis, besides being made of sterner stuff, were literal 'Fire Monsters' who feasted on thermal energy. The blaze abruptly winked out, revealing a disgruntled female Godzillasaur, now a good 30 feet taller and royally pissed.
Gamera exploited this opening to hammer the black dragon with a barrage of fireballs, blasting great gouts of scaly hide and ichor from Ancalagon's upper torso. From behind, Gojira seized the dragon's murderous tail in powerful claws and played a brief game of Crack the Whip, beating Ancalagon against the ground with ruthless force. Barreling in, Anguirus clamped crocodilian jaws about the dragon's armored neck and absorbed the monster's furious beating with nary a grunt of pain. Abruptly, all three monsters were sent flying as a great sphere of Eldritch Energy™ erupted from Ancalagon's body, blasting a vast crater in the earth below. Rising into the air, Ancalagon shrieked his rage to the heavens, then stooped upon Mecha Ghidorah II like death itself, bashing the Mech into the ground in a shower of sparks. Thankfully, Mr. Pope was given a brief respite as Miyako unloaded a Spiral Beam™, blasting the dragon back several thousand feet and incidentally, just short of the mountain. Roughly several hundred human, dinosaurian and Martian bladders voided their contents. Raptor's merry band breathed a relieved sigh as Ancalagon ignored them for the moment, wheeling back to the battle as Gamera took off in a blaze of Plasma Jets©, slamming into the dragon with panache. Mere yards away, Melkor and the Geekspawn held a brief council of war.
"So... You're certain his power base is in the Heart?"
"Yep. Nothing else would explain that pulse we just saw. Bust the sucker and we should be able to take him down."
"OK then. Sorry about all this, dude."
"Geek, you can apologize when I see you in hell. Get your ass in gear!"
Striking like a great serpent, Ancalagon buried gnarled yellow fangs in Gamera's neck, grinding into the Guardian's windpipe. Anguirus, lunging in to assist, was met with a swipe of the terrible pronged tail which buried itself in the armored brawler's left shoulder. Wailing in agony, Anguirus fell short of his mark and was pummeled further as the struggling titans stumbled back and forth over his prone frame. Finally, Gamera laid Ancalagon's own throat wide open with a slash of his spur-tipped left elbow, forcing the dragon to release his grip as eldritch flesh sealed. Several thousand feet back, two Gojirae unleashed a barrage of atomic flame, forcing both fighters to take evasive action. Gamera hurled himself to the ground as Ancalagon took to the dark skies. Abruptly, an eerie glow built up about the winged horror's chest. Squinting, Ubergeek perceived a dark speck wedged into the dragon's armored scales.
So that's where the Heart ended up... Without further ado, Ancalagon emitted a sickly looking lance of energy and the ground directly beneath him burst into crimson flame, then vanished. The dragon emitted a booming chuckle. This was the Flame of Udun™, his lost master's most terrible weapon. It purified and annihilated all that it touched. Inexorably, the circle of Death spread and Ancalagon, rising high into the night air, bathed the island outskirts in hellfire, trapping the pathetic beings that called this place home. Below, Uber was quick to explain the one chance they had to his consort, her Mech-driving comrade and James D, who conveyed said information to a battered Gamera. A determined growl was the Guardian's
only response as he rose to do battle again, Mecha Ghidorah II assuming a flanking position.
Intent on driving these insolent pests into the Flame®, Ancalagon dove to intercept and was forced to break off the attack as three atomic bolts bored in on his flight path. Though the dragon evaded the were-Gojis' beams, Gojira's murderous blast caught him in the gut, sending Ancalagon dropping from the air like an especially grotesque rock. He crashed atop the mountain, threatening to bury the party beneath as he regained his feet. Anguirus, intent on vengeance for his earlier injuries, was first to reach the dragon, tearing into Ancalagon's gut with a jerk of his nasal horn before a gout of hellfire drove him back. From range, Gojira opened up with another atomic blast, this time, however, Ancalagon was ready, projecting an opaque energy shield that caught and dissipated the beam, though it pushed the dragon back several hundred feet.
At that moment, Mecha Ghidorah II struck from above, activating the Kaiju Clamp and gamely attempting to reel Ancalagon in. The dragon, having none of it, called upon the very elements themselves. Overhead, a fusillade of heat lightning sprang up, nearly overloading even the Mech's powerful surge protectors. Pope cursed as several consoles spewed sparks, obscuring his HUD. Fortunately, Ancalagon's concentration was rudely shattered a barrage of fireballs hammered the monstrosity, forcing him to erect yet another shield against Gamera's attack. Rapidly scanning the battlefield, the dragon leered with glee. Gojira and Anguirus, forced to the island's Hellfire-ringed outskirts by the expanding Flame of Udun, were moments away from total destruction. The more agile were-Gojis had managed to skirt the flame and now charged. Twin lances of atomic fury raked Ancalagon's rear leg and wing root, forcing the dragon to wheel and meet their attack. Whirling about, Ancalagon once more struck out with his wicked tail. Too close to dodge, Miyako crouched, taking the blow across her spined back. Although the prongs failed to do any serious damage, they did raise several gouts of ichor.
Taking the only shot he'd have, Ubergeek tackled Ancalagon and the two grappled in a wild, snarling blur of tooth and claw that ended with the dragon on his back, Uber's talons ripping into the scales of his chest and coming up with a dark, pulsing speck. As the font of dark power was abruptly cut off, Ancalagon's eyes widened. NO!
"Hell, yes!" The Geekspawn tossed the Heart of the Black™ into the air and vaporized it in a blaze of atomic flame. In a final desperate effort, Ancalagon slammed his rear hooves into Uber's chest, sending his attacker flying back. Rolling to his feet, the dragon prepared to make his escape as Gamera touched down scant feet from his muzzle, eyes blazing. One fist cocked back, blazing with a purifying flame. 1.3 seconds later, the Banishing Fist struck home, burning its way through the dragon's skull. His long career of blood and glory ended at last, Ancalagon the Black vanished in an eruption of dust and the Flame of Udun, its wielder gone, faded away scant feet from the trapped monsters. This time, Gamera and Ubergeek led the Obligatory Victory Bellow®, then contemplated the issue of what to do next.
Back at the cave, Melkor swept Queen Ghidorah up in a celebratory embrace. Angillis strode up with an entourage of superheroes, who, realizing they weren't needed, promptly departed as the Martian Supreme Commander turned to a mortified Gamingboy.
"Helluva show, wouldn't ya say, GB?"
"Can't talk...too busy checking my boxers."
"This cant be good!" yelled Angillis as something came out of the ground. It was the Giant Tape Worm that lives in the black hole that is his room. His name is Wormy and he shoots laser beams out of his eyes.
"Can't we ever get a break?!" asked Uber.
"Hello. I see you met my tape worm, Wormy," said a very stinky Angillis.
"Man, you STINK!" cried Queen G.
"You would stink too if you were eaten five different times in one day!!!" yelled Angillis. Miyako, fixing an exasperated expression on both him and his tapeworm, discreetly moved upwind, closely followed by the rest of the island population.
"Look, kid... I have no idea what you've been lacing your Cocoa Puffs® with but the giant intestinal parasite is a bit much. Get rid of it or I will." Wormy was no fool and quickly complied, slithering off into the sunset... err, sunrise with Angillis on board.
The King of Monsters® and his sparring partner, tuckered out by the night's events, let out departing roars and followed suit. Seeing that he wasn't needed at the moment, Gamera lumbered to the top of the mountain, retracted into his shell and went to sleep. Touching down, Pope shut down Mecha Ghidorah for the moment, exited the battle-mauled machine and introduced himself to Raptor's band. He gracefully accepted a swig of the Martian Supreme Commander's secret stash, then engaged Raptor in a long conversation regarding the metaphysical repercussions of the night's events.
The Odo Islanders, after casting a nervous glance at the army of dinosaurs and the monster slumbering atop the mountain, began to rebuild their homes. Several Kaijuphiles, having nothing better to do, tagged along to help. Said army of dinosaurs, casting nervous glances at one another, melted away into the forest. Gorlack, Seemor and Jesse, with Neena perched atop his back, led the Raptors in one direction. A bewildered Chac stalked off in another.
Shuffling back to their mountain shelter, the reconstruction crew literally dropped, resting against the cave walls. Melkor, with Queen Ghidorah draped against his left side, extended a foot to roll Gamingboy over into Lord Jimifulss, cutting off the horrendous snores of both.
That more or less accounted for everyone, save a certain Spawn of Kenny and his female consort who had reverted to human form. Running on an adrenaline high from the primordial combat they'd been locked in for the past several hours, the two slipped off for some Discovery Channel-esque R&R. And thus the chaos subsided... for now.
Gorlack broke off from the rest of the saurians, monsters, humans and whatever else may have been on that freakish island and wandered toward the eastern shore. Sighing heavily, he flopped down on a small sand dune.
"Bit much to take in in one day, isn't it?" Duriss commented, hopping off of his back. Gorlack snorted sarcastically.
"That's an understatement if I've ever heard one."
"Hey, it's not my fault we're here," Duriss replied defensively.
"I know. It's just that I don't even know where 'here' is or how I got here."
"Well, at least one thing remains constant," Duriss figured, nodding toward the raising moon. Gorlack shrugged dismissively and laid his head down on his forepaws. Duriss glared at the pathetic lump of dino and hopped off into the forest. Gorlack raised his head, ready to call her back but simply sighed again and laid his head back down.
"Soon, the testing will be done and we will make our own Godzilla!" yelled the alien leader. And who else but Jesse were they testing on! When the experiment was done, he was a Godzillasaurus!
"This has been the freakiest day I ever had!" yelled James.
"Not true! Remember around the first of the year..." replied Raptor, only to be muffled by her cohort.
Emerging from the forest, Miyako and Ubergeek (looking even more rumpled than usual) sized up this disturbing development.
"Err... who's the new Gojirasaur?" Spying his new friends, Jesse roared his welcome. The pair turned to the Martian Supreme Commander.
"Let me guess... Plot to conquer Earth?"
"Indeed... And just what do you plan to do about it?" As one, their eyes glowed a baleful crimson. He stepped back as a Hypacrosaur barreled from the trees to their left, closely followed by a slavering Giganotosaur. Sadly for the crested herbivore, its path took it directly in front of Jesse, who lunged in and snapped its neck with a single bite. Chac, fuming at this apparent theft of her meal, charged with a savage roar and a bewildered Jesse was forced to the defensive.
"Hmm... should we separate 'em?" mused Ubergeek.
"Nah. I say give 'em five minutes."
"Say... Could you two move?" Mr. Pope, armed with a video camera, shouldered the were-Gojis aside and jogged after the battling titans.
"Get off of me!!!" Jesse yelled as Chac was on top of him but quickly got off because Neena was pecking at her.
"He stole my dinner!" Chac yelled.
"I did not! All I did was protect myself! You can have that thing!"
"Oh! Okay!" Chac said and walked away with the kill.
"Hello all! I am back!" yelled Angillis, riding on Wormy.
Sensing that perhaps it would be best if he laid low until the heat died down, Jesse tromped off into the forest, Neena perched on his dorsal ridges. Glaring after them, Chac released a derisive growl, then bent down to eat. Several yards away, Mr. Pope was excitedly filming the gory spectacle, perhaps a tad too close for his own good, which became evident as the huge carnivore, mistaking him for a would-be scavenger, raised her head and snarled, spraying the video camera (and Pope) with bits of ex-Hypacrosaur.
"Eh... I'll just take a couple big steps back..." At that moment, Wormy showed up, a familiar Kaijuphile astride the massive intestinal parasite. Chomping down his quota of breakfast popcorn (which turned out to be the only food Jimi had bothered to bring), Gamingboy groaned.
"Aw, nuts... Angillis and his worm are back." Of course, things quickly took a turn for the stranger as an eerie barking roar shook the trees. Thundering into the clearing, Anguirus sized up the bizarre undulating serpentine thing. Not the most appetizing of creatures but he'd make do. Having reached this conclusion in half a second, the mutated nodosaur barreled forward, jaws gaping and was abruptly halted by a viselike grip to the tail. Uber, having failed to note the irregular spikes, snarled several obscenities and was forced to let go as the armored horror rounded on him with a furious howl. A brutal, vaguely WWE-esque tangle ensued as the saurian titans rolled back and forth, flattening flora and scattering fauna. Wormy, eager to help out, slithered up and attempted to lace Anguirus' feet together.
Bemoaning the lack of caffeine based products, Miyako transformed, stomped up to the tangle and proceeded to knock Anguirus silly with a tail smack upside his horn-crowned head. Although the first hit did get his attention, it took six more (as well as several near misses that loosened Uber's teeth) to really drive the point home. Shaking his head, Anguirus finally meandered off.
"Right then. Geek, where's the freaking time machine? I've had about as much of this lunacy as I can stand."
"If you don't fix that thing, we will make sure you wish you were never BORN!!! yelled everyone except the thing known as Angillis.
"Okay! If the time space continuum is not fixed, we will soon have... Oh no! Too late!" declared Angillis as a virtual menagerie of mechanical and biological monstrosities began to appear, summoned by Ubergeek's malfunctioning device. They eyed one another balefully (save for M.O.G.U.E.R.A., Super Mechagodzilla and Jet Jaguar which lumbered up to the two were-Gojis and Mecha Ghidorah II for a council of war.
Mr. Pope was first to break the silence. "Gentlemen... err, gentlepersons... gentlethings. I have the funny feeling all hell's about to break loose. Any ideas?"
Uber: "Well, M-G II's time travel doohickey seems to be functioning properly. What say we do what we can to clean this mess up and get the hell outta here?"
Col. Kuroki (commanding Super MG): "Sounds good to us. What should we be gunning for?"
Miyako: "Whatever you do, stay the @#@# away from Legion. The beams that bug puts out can mess up a Mech like you wouldn't believe."
Pope: "Also, we might want to leave Kong and Biollante to their own devices. And I don't know what in God's name that Majin chap might be up to but I'd keep out of his way as well."
With that settled, the Ogasawara personnel activated targeting systems, Miyako and Ubergeek tensed and two blood-curdling howls announced the arrival of Gojira and Anguirus.
"Right then. Let's get it on." The island erupted in enraged bellows, earth shaking footfalls and ungodly flashes of power. Fortunately for the G-FORCE crew, most of the newcomers seemed happy to tear into one another. Kong and Gabara, locked in an electric death grip, rolled back and forth, sending the Odo Islanders scrambling for the hills as their village was steamrollered. With an ungodly roar, Biollante rumbled toward Mechagodzilla I, which ripped into the titanic plant with a hail of missiles and beams. Rising into the air, Gigan and Megaguirus squared off, then streaked toward one another, hooks and pincers clashing. Back on the ground, Legion slammed into Destoroyah, putting the crustacean monstrosity on its back before enveloping it in the Swarm.
Jet Jaguar, pitted against the Mysterian war machine, easily dodged Mogera's laser cannons and darted in for some hand-to-hand action. With that, the Ogasawara crew weighed in. Super MG, gunning straight for Gojira, was greeted with a blast of atomic fire which drew a rueful grin from Kuroki as the Plasma Grenade charged up. Seconds later, the Monster King was rewarded with a barrage of his own energy and reeled back with an enraged snarl. M.O.G.U.E.R.A., coming up from behind, intercepted Anguirus with a salvo of Spiral Missiles, one of which glanced off the ankylosaur's spiny carapace. The second detonated, blasting off a chunk of armor and eliciting an agonized scream but failing to stop Ang's charge. Unable to get airborne in time, M.O.G.U.E.R.A. was tackled to the ground. Mecha Ghidorah II, separating Kong and Gabara with a flurry of gravitic beams, ensnared the warty bully in a Clamp®; Tugging furiously at the mandibles, Gabara employed his electricity, nearly overloading M-G before a massive boulder shattered over his head, KOing the ogre. Kong, flashing what resembled a 'thumbs-up' at a surprised Pope, dashed off to assist Biollante against Mechagodzilla.
The Majin, advancing on a perturbed pair of were-Gojis, spoke. "I sense a disturbance in the fabric of reality..."
"Uh, yeah. That's my fault," admitted the Geekspawn. "I don't suppose you're here to exact vengeance?"
"Merely to make things as they should be," replied the terrible spirit. "If you were to return to your own time and take your companions with you, the matter would be settled."
"Great, 'cause that's what we're planning to do," Miyako interjected. "Now then..."
"Of course, the battle. This should be fun." With that, Majin turned toward Legion, which was looming triumphantly over a mangled Destoroyah. Stretching his right hand forth, he summoned a field of static electricity which had an explosive effect upon the Swarm. Clustering together, the silicon horrors shuddered and attempted to fight the control but failed, spreading out instead to fall upon Gigan, Megaguirus and a battered Mechagodzilla. Kong, having wrestled the robot into a full nelson, was forced to leap back as the insects began eating away at it. Legion, furious at this manipulation of her warriors, opened her massive horn and unleashed an electromagnetic beam upon Majin. Cursing as one, Uber and Miyako sprang clear as the oni's statue form was blasted apart, though, curiously, the effect upon Legion's swarm remained. Splitting up, the were-Gojis sprinted to flank Legion and charged from either side. Spinning toward Ubergeek, the insect fired off a fusillade of laser whips, Uber barely rolling out of the way. He winced as one of his upper dorsals was hacked off at the top. Miyako fared better, leaping onto Legion's back and locking her arms about the massive central horn. Shrieking with rage, Legion attempted to scrape this insolent assailant off, plunging back and forth like a bucking bronco. Miyako, dorsals flaring as she built up power, was abruptly raked by a pair of rear legs which laid her upper thighs open. Uber, staggering to his feet, tried to distract Legion with a heat beam to the face. Activating her shield, she easily deflected the atomic flame and charged in his direction, sending him on the run.
Finally, Miyako unloaded a supercharged atomic pulse, charring Legion's upper surfaces a solid black and more importantly, blasting away several shield generating horns. Trying a second heat beam, Uber found a gap in the shield, scorching the right side of Legion's crown before a second EM beam, this time far closer to home, sent him flying back for a good quarter mile. Snarling furiously, Miyako tore away another shield horn in her jaws and happened to notice a massive eldritch fireball descending upon them.
It would be wise to move now. Breaking away at the last second, Miyako hit the ground, rolled and looked up to gape at the pyrotechnic spectacle. Staggering from the flame, Legion shuddered, shedding several major appendages. It released a rattling growl and collapsed, a charred husk. Slowly regaining his feet, the Geekspawn shook his head.
"Can we go again, Mommy?" Giving her male counterpart a memory-jarring smack, Miyako directed his attention back to the chaos at hand.
"C'mon. We've got friends to help out." Fortunately, very little help seemed to be necessary. Jet Jaguar, having torn the massive buzz saw disk from Mogera's back, had proceeded to decapitate the fragile war machine and seemed to be drawing a bead on Gigan and Megaguirus as their battle continued. Biollante, regurgitating the head of Mechagodzilla, made a beeline for her genetic "brother" who had apparently gotten his claws on Super MG and was now beating the machine with its own severed arm. Several hundred yards away, M.O.G.U.E.R.A. regained its feet as Kong, keeping Anguirus occupied, whaled away at his foe's horned head. As if on cue, Gigan, gushing ichor from a fresh wound, crashed to the earth scant feet from Uber's muzzle. Leaping up, he shrieked a challenge, hooks spread and was greeted with a kick to the face from Miyako, followed by a tail sweep that took the cyborg off its feet once again.
"You two have fun now," quipped the Geekspawn as he dashed off to assist Jet Jaguar against an enraged Megaguirus.
"Oh, why not!" yelled Angillis as he and Wormy rode off to battle, joined by several new Showa monsters.
"Um, Uber... If you don't fix that NOW, WE WILL KILL YOU!!!" yelled every human on the island as the place erupted in a hellish cavalcade of shrieks, roars and explosions.
Exchanging murderous glares, Bagan and Dagarah opened up on one another, sending lesser beings scrambling out of the crossfire. Clipping Megaguirus' wings with a salvo of gravitic blasts, King Ghidorah cackled with glee. Striking out, Manda coiled about Gezora and the two collapsed in a tangled heap. Sizing up the great ape, Gaira tackled Kong to the ground, instigating a brutal wrestling match. Charging Guilala, Baragon was met with a left hook to the chin. Rising into the air, Jiger fired a skeletonizing beam which was quickly deflected by the second Legion. Hedorah, warbling its grotesque war cry, was treated to a blast of flame from Gojira. Irys, raising her armored head, screamed an ungodly summons to the Gyaos swarm circling above. Two were-Gojis, several G-FORCE machines, one spirit-driven botanical horror and a mutated Anklyosaurus goggled at the scene. Col. Kuroki, wincing as a panel to his right erupted in smoke, was first to speak.
"Uh, Mr. Pope... I don't suppose there's any problem with getting the hell out of here?"
"Technically, no. But do we really want to leave the Odo Islanders with that bunch?"
"Good point." Miyako, distracted for a second, snarled as Gigan got in a slash to the shoulder. "Pipe down!" A point-blank atomic beam quickly left the cyborg occupied with clawing at his smoldering optic visor.
"Er... Any way we could just dump them off somewhere else?" The Geekspawn gestured toward the battling monstrosities.
"Not a bad idea... Gimme a minute or two with the capacitor," replied Pope. An azure explosion drew their gazes to the right and Jiger's smoking carcass rolled up to Uber's feet.
"That may be a problem." Awakened by the arrival of his nemesis, Gamera rocketed from behind the mountain, howled a challenge and plowed into Irys at just under the speed of sound. Higher up, several thousand Gyaos shrieked their bloodlust, prepared to dive upon their enemy and wailed in confusion as an oddly controlled typhoon formed about them, tossing the winged horrors back and forth in a spray of haze punctuated by odd flashes of heat lightning. Bizarrely enough, the events below proceeded unaffected.
Mortals, whatever you may have planned, it would be wise to implement it now.
"Sho'nuff, Majin. Thanks." And without further ado, the Ogasawara fighters plunged in. Peeling Gaira off Kong, Miyako spun the Gargantua about, locked her jaws about his head and snapped the primate's neck with a savage wrench. Having been engaged in a game of 'Pluck the Limbs' with Dagarah's corpse, Bagan snarled at the intrusion and tossed the mangled form at Uber who leapt aside as M.O.G.U.E.R.A. raked the demon with plasma blasts. Hanging back for a moment, Super MG's crew scanned the combatants, looking for a safe target, only to have Ghidorah decide the issue for them, plunging upon the machine in a hail of thrashing wings and gravitic fury.
Thankfully, most of the other monsters were still entangled with each other. Shifting targets, Legion barreled up to Guilala, bowling the Space Chicken® over with a sweep of the horn. Biollante, striking from behind, made a game attempt to rip the insect's rear limbs off. Baragon, wisely leaving the three to their own devices, joined Manda in savaging Gezora. Anguirus, charging in at Hedorah from behind, shrieked as his toothy muzzle was seared by the Smog Monster's acidic compounds and a half mile off, Gamera and Irys swooped about one another, unleashing savage barrages of flame and sound. Abruptly, the darkened sky erupted in a horrendous flash as Majin opened the Gates of Hell, banishing the Gyaos horde to the Underworld©. That task completed, the malefic spirit prepared to take his leave.
That was entertaining. We shall have to do this again... Kenny, was it?
"Uh, yeah, sure," responded Uber.
"All right, then. Portal 1 away!" announced Mr. Pope. A round, innocuous panel opened in Mecha Ghidorah II's chest plate and generated a cone of kaleidoscopic funkiness. When the Time/Space Portal closed, Baragon, Guilala, Legion, Gigan, Kong, Manda, Ghidorah, Biollante and Super Mechagodzilla had vanished.
"Eh, Mr. Pope. Where'd you send 'em?" inquired Miyako.
"Right back to Ogasawara. I'm sure the boys can help Kuroki out of that mess," he chortled. Of course, this left Hedorah, Irys and a disgruntled Bagan for the remaining monsters to deal with. Bagan was quick to remind them, plucking Jet Jaguar from his armored shoulders and hurling the robot into M.O.G.U.E.R.A., bowling both over. As Pope prepared another Portal, the were-Gojis dashed off to double-team Irys who was hammered from the air and landed at Mecha Ghidorah II's feet. Obligingly activating the Clamp®, Pope snared the Gyaos-derived horror and winced as its tendrils punched chunks out of the Mech's wings. He sighed in relied as the partially completed Portal worked its mojo, sending Irys off for a long stay at the Ogasawara facilities.
Elsewhere, things weren't going as well. Taking to the air, Hedorah enveloped Gojira and Anguirus in a corrosive miasma, sending both stumbling away in agony. Bagan, for his part, smacked Miyako aside with a slash of his blade-tipped tail and commenced a literal Flame War, pitting his hellfire against Uber's atomic ray. From Bagan's left, M.O.G.U.E.R.A. opened up again, prompting the demon to growl his annoyance and take the robot's arms off with a pair of Slasher Disks. Scooping up a boulder, Jet Jaguar intervened with a textbook pitch that snapped Bagan's head to the right and allowed Uber to send him reeling back with a burst of nuclear power.
Making some rapid changes to the 'Drop Zone' for his next portal, Pope's fingers flew over the controls and sent # 3 on its way with relish. Bagan, unwilling to go without a fight, roared his rage as he tried to lurch away from the vortex. Miyako, leaping in, slammed both feet into the demon's chest, rebounding off and rolling aside as the Portal closed about the hell beast, sending him on a one-way trip to sometime between the Big Bang© and the formation of Earth. This left three Gojirae, plus Mecha Ghidorah II, the Guardian of the Universe and a crippled M.O.G.U.E.R.A. to commence desiccating Hedorah. Quickly reduced to a dried heap by atomic flame, then blasted apart by Gamera's fireballs, the Smog Monster went down with nary a whimper. Robo-Penguin's captain shook her head, vainly trying to clear the Kumonga-proportioned cobwebs.
"Can we go home now?"
"Amen," chorused several dozen human and saurian voices. Pope was quick to oblige, activating Time Portal # 4.
Back on Odo Island...
When the Purple Haze lifted, an unruly gaggle of Kaijuphiles, plus the army of dinosaurs, Martian invaders and several very disoriented Odo Islanders stood in the Ogasawara foyer. The natives were quickly attended to by several conscientious secretaries, the Martians goose-stepped off by well-armed security personnel and the dinosaurs (thankfully) were content to simply stare blankly into the distance.
"Whoo," Lord Jimi eloquently observed. "Who wants to go again?" Gamingboy, Melkor and Queen Ghidorah fought to be the first to smack him upside the head.
Elsewhere, Ubergeek and Miyako had materialized on the rim of a dormant volcano in the island interior. Ungodly howls and snarls could be heard as Ogasawara's new inmates carved out their respective niches. Nearly collapsing from exhaustion, Uber gingerly settled into a sitting position. He was aching in spots he never knew had nerve endings. Beside him, a long moan indicated that Miyako was in an equivalent state.
"Nice night," the female were-Goji commented, gazing up at the nearly full moon. For a moment, all was thrown into darkness as an insectile shape blotted the satellite out and was dive-bombed from above by an indistinguishable something.
"True, true. Oh, yeah, before I forget..." the Geekspawn reached into one of many pockets and drew out a familiar device.
"Aw, hell, not again!" his companion began. With a pulse of thermal energy, Ubergeek converted the time travel device to ash.
"Indeed. Time I got back to tinkering with that anti-matter cannon. Well... maybe later." Arm in arm, the pair made way down the mountain.
"Hello, guys! Um. Guys, I think you forgot me! Guys, this is not funny!!!" yelled a forgotten Angillis and Wormy.
The next morning, Raptor and James D performed a quick head count.
"Hmm... seems like we've got everyone except Uber, that nice Miyako girl..."
"Nah, they're around somewhere," interjected Melkor. "Gorosaurus just walked by with the oddest expression on his face."
"...and Angillis... and the worm."
"Whoops! Must've missed 'em in all the hubbub," shrugged Mr. Pope. "I'll just pop on back and pick 'em up."
As things developed, he was just in time. Gojira, having cornered poor Wormy, was about to reduce Kaijuphile and tapeworm alike to radioactive ash when Mecha Ghidorah II, materializing above the scene, swooped in with the Time Portal charged for a last second rescue. With his prey departed in an octarine blur, the Monster King bellowed his rage to the heavens and returned to the depths for now. (or was it then?)
Back "home," Angillis was greeted with slaps on the back and vending machine coffee. Wormy, set free to play nice with the other monsters, slithered off to converse with Manda and Reptilicus. And so, the sun set on another insane but idyllic, day.
"How do we get back home?" asked Jesse, with Neena on his back.
"Alright, guys... err, dinos! Time to go to your own time!" yelled Mr. Pope. He sent them, Angillis, Wormy and Raptor back in time.
"Why did you send that worm, Raptor and Angillis with them?" asked Miyako.
"They asked me to."
Chapter 12: CULTURE SHOCK
Taking Angillis and his bizarre pet under her wing, Raptor commenced her research project: a long term analysis of post-KT dinosaur behavior. Seemor and his pack, intelligent and benign as they seemed, were a good place to start and the Utahraptor quickly agreed to the humans' presence once their intentions were made clear. The Babel Fish translators Raptor picked up from a brief trip to 2033 proved especially useful. Elsewhere, a duel of top predators was about to begin.
Chac, having regained Jesse's trail soon after the time hop, was ready to dispose of this threat to her new territory, as well as work off some bitter feelings from her last encounter with a Rex. Moving in from behind, the Giga prepared for a devastating slashing strike which would hamstring her massive foe. She did a silent double take at the sight of the Gojirasaur, happily munching away at a clump of cicads. Apparently, the beasts were omnivorous, capable of digesting meat and plants with equal facility.
Not entirely eager to tackle such a formidable foe (and relieved that perhaps Jesse wouldn't offer any competition after all), Chac moved off as silently as she'd come.
"Let me guess, Neena. That Giga thing was about to try to kill me, right?" asked Jesse.
"WOW, WORMY! WOW!!!" yelled Angillis. He and Raptor were riding Wormy when the tape worm was attacked by a Showa Godzillasaurus!
Chapter 13: INTESTINAL AND FUTURE TERRORS
Departing from one potentially deadly confrontation, Chac now beheld yet another, this one involving a gigantic, foul-smelling worm, some mentally addled primate foolish enough to be riding it and another of those new carnivores.
Had she the proper vocabulary, the Giganotosaur would have cursed fluently. Where... are these THINGS... coming from?! Ever since that trip to the Island of Giant Hideous Things, nothing had been as it was supposed to be. Monsters dropped out of nowhere, hairless primates ran about squeaking like idiots and nothing ever seemed to stay the same. Shuddering, Chac turned back to the forest, away from the disturbing scene and was nearly bowled over by Jesse as the altered tyrannosaur charged to his new friends' rescue. Curling her lip, she considered pressing the issue but decided it wasn't worth the insanity that would no doubt ensue. Given a respite by Jesse's intervention, Raptor and Angillis were quick to take their leave as the Gojirasaurs sized one another up and began grunting back and forth.
"Whoa... What is that?" wondered Angillis.
"Sounds like... badly dubbed English," figured Raptor. Angillis wondered what the possibilities of that happening were until he remembered who he was, then he just shook it off.
"How about we just sneak away quietly before we get eaten?" Raptor suggested.
Jesse had been quite astounded to find himself face to face with another Godzillasaurus, even if he didn't realize that was what he now was. "Are you from around here?" he tentatively asked.
"No, I do not recognize this place," the beast admitted. "It is very strange here."
"Yes," Jesse agreed. "But at least we're not alone." Although he might have been lacking in mental capacity, his hormones were up to par and hitting on all cylinders. The creature before him was FEMALE! He let out a bellow of triumph, challenging the world to even try and dispute his claim to all he now surveyed. The thunderous roar sent two Kaijuphiles and one giant tapeworm diving into the underbrush for cover. Chac merely continued on her way, shaking her head in disgust at the shenanigans as the latest Giant Hideous Thing added her chorus to the heavens.
Chapter: 14: SO THAT'S HOW THEY WERE BORN...
A couple of hours later, Angillis was wandering, Raptor was napping, Neena and the two G's were together and Wormy was beating his head on a tree.
Back in the present:
"MY GOD! WHO WOULDA KNEW???!!!" Everyone cried. Leisurely making their way back to base after an R&R-filled night, Ubergeek and Miyako were accosted with a friendly bellow. They looked up to wave at Godzilla Junior and his sire. Appropriately enough at that moment, several new atomic titans materialized out of God-knows-where as the time line was altered. For a long, unsettling moment, father and son exchanged stares with the new arrivals: two violet spined titans. One was bulky, the other a vaguely lizard-like Gojirasaur. They were massive theropods, similar to the were-Gojis' transformed selves but more closely resembling a scaled-up T.rex or Allosaurus. And one white eyed, sneering demon. Of course, the moment was soon broken in a hellish cacophony of roars, shrieks and the crackle of atomic energy as the melee erupted. Exchanging exasperated glances, Miyako and the Geekspawn girded themselves for a royal rumble, only to be distracted as something tugged at the cuff of Miyako's pants. Turning, the pair beheld a sickeningly cute little girl, no more than 5 or 6, gazing up with wide almond-shaped eyes and nervously waving a spiny tail behind her.
"Are you my mommy?" Another glance, this one accentuated with wide eyes, was exchanged.
"Er... why don't I get you something to eat and then we can talk?"
"Yay! I like food!" squeaked the apparition.
"I'm sure you do..." Moving to follow the females, Uber was halted with a jerk of his companion's thumb, indicating that he was expected to somehow work out the brawl behind them. Actually pleased with this release from an awkward scenario, the Geekspawn shifted, roared an enthusiastic challenge and plunged into the fight.
Catching a whiff of mingled Gojirasaur scents and instantly deducing what had happened, Chac winced. Soon enough, she'd be sharing territory with a family of the Things. Depressed by this latest thought, the Giganotosaur failed to keep her 'eyes on the road' and was thus surprised as the 'rock' she stepped on reared up with an enraged bellow, baring knife-like teeth from five foot jaws. Crouching, Chac snarled, baring her own fangs and prepared for a duel, only to blink as her eyes and nostrils processed the nature of this beast. Poised tensely before her was a mottled tan hulk of a theropod, nearly her match in length and height while packing an even thicker midriff. Three-clawed hands flexed nervously below a huge skull, thinner and less rugose than a tyrannosaur's. Overall, aside from an intangible difference in the scent, this newcomer was a mirror image of Chac's long deceased kin. Of course, she had no way of knowing that this was a Carcharodontosaurus, Africa's dominant predator and close relation to her species. Conversely, the newcomer had no way aside from the scent of distinguishing Chac from a member of his kind, and an especially fetching one at that. Even the stump of a left arm failed to detract from this strange female's robust appeal. Slowly easing out of their respective threat displays, the two carnivores sized one another up and caught the scent of distant prey. In unspoken agreement, they turned south together, splitting up as they vanished into the underbrush. Finally, something about this world seemed to make sense to Chac.
Seemor groaned and muttered curses. Who the heck were these smart humans? He was beginning to think that if-
"WHOWWW!" Thud! "Owch!" Seemor hid as a blue-furred, devil-tailed, curly-haired cat dusted itself off.
"Dang, dude! I'm like, in dinosaur times." Seemor roared and scared Catbert, the Evil HR Director off and went to search for the huge Quetzalcoatl he had befriended.
Thrown back a good half kilometer by a Blue Ray o' Doom© c/o 'Oni'-zilla, the Spawn of Kenny slid to a halt, rolled to his feet and snarled as he spied the demon powering up for another shot. Getting a running start as the fiend's jaws gaped wide with a terrible light blazing within, Uber sprang skyward, curled into a spiny ball and crashed down atop the Oni, knocking his pot-bellied foe head over heels. Bouncing up, Ubergeek spied the theropod trio warily circling an enraged Godzilla while Junior grappled with the lizard-like Gojirasaur mere feet away. Fortunately, neither of the remaining newcomers had opted to attack yet, instead sizing one another up with confused frowns creasing their fanged visages. Behind him, the Oni bellowed furiously as it struggled to regain its feet. This merited a nasty stomp kick to the head as Uber engaged it once more.
Trudging into Ogasawara HQ with the new arrival perched on her shoulders, Miyako drew more than a few surprised glances. Col. Kuroki, exiting a nearby rest room, took the situation in with a glance.
"Let me guess... New space/time anomaly?"
"I can only assume."
"Right... Come on down to Genetics if you want any tests run."
"Will do. Oh, and this isn't our only surprise today."
"Let me guess: more monsters?"
"Sir, if you aren't psychic, you're close."
"OK, then. I'll get on the horn with Security and see what we can call up." Dashing off, Kuroki left the pair to make their way to the Food Court.
Back at the slobberknocker, Godzilla was quick to school his feral attackers, raking one with a blast of atomic hell, catching another with a sweep of the tail and whirling to deflect the third's snapping jaws, wrestling this Dino-Goji® into a headlock. Meanwhile, Junior was getting on top of his situation, swinging his reptilian foe about by its lengthy tail before releasing his grip, sending it smack into his sire's second foe who had just shaken off a tail whack when this intruder slammed into him. Bowled over, both saurians commenced a frenetic bout of shrieks, slashes and bites, leaving the Gs free to drive Dino-Gojis 1 and 3 back with a nuclear salvo. Having come to an understanding, the spiny 'samurai' Godzillae finally turned their attentions to the battlefield and were promptly greeted by a stray blast from the Oni. Releasing dual baritone bellows, the pair oriented on the grappling interlopers and charged up with fire blossoming on their massive jagged fins and fired.
Uber, having spied the upcoming assault with a second to spare, quickly disengaged from Oni and rolled away, leaving the hulking horror to shriek in agony as high-powered atomic rays slammed into its chest and face. Lifted off his taloned feet, the Oni was sent flying back into a gorge which promptly imploded about him as he struggled to claw his way upright.
Gathering a truly massive assortment of foodstuffs, Miyako paused for a moment to assess the nymphette. That tail was certainly familiar, as was the glazed, ravenous gaze the young were-Goji(?) focused on the huge platter. Dismissing the matter for now, she set the bounty down at a table in the court's center. Taking seats on opposite sides, the two contemplated this gastronomic undertaking, brandished plastic utensils and began the feast.
Back at the battle, Oni Gojira, now thrashing beneath a 40 foot layer of rock, was quickly joined by one of the theropods, KOed by an Atomic Pulse™, then bodily tossed into what remained of the pit. A final bout of atomic beams blitzed the general area, stilling both for the moment. The remaining Dino-Goji©, astutely estimating his chances, spun about and began a swift retreat, straight into a hail of cadmium-tipped Full Metal Missiles, followed by a sustained blast of freon. As it collapsed, Super-Xes I and III swooped overhead, rocking their wings as Uber waved in acknowledgment. Coming about for another pass, the attack crafts' crews noted a battle-scarred Godzilla and Junior exchanging glares with two of the newcomers who, deciding not to press the issue, turned away toward the massive lagoon in the island interior. Col. Gondo was quick to provide Ubergeek with an update.
"Seems like the new guys don't feel up for any more playtime, Geek. We'll be heading on back if you don't mind."
"Sho'nuff, Colonel. I'm right behind you." Pausing for a moment to join the True-Gojis® in a triumphant roar, the Geekspawn bounded off for HQ, anxious to resolve just what the hell had gone on in the past.
Speaking of which, two huge carnivores had just flushed out a nice mid-day snack. Squealing with unadulterated terror, Seemor and Catbert scrambled about cicads, trees and fellow woodland creatures for all they were worth, great fanged jaws gaping mere inches behind. So consumed were Chac and Mbembe by the thrill of the hunt that they had burst into the clearing right on top of the resting Godzillasaurs before anyone knew what was happening.
"RHAAAAARR-HAHAHAHARRRRRR!" And with that, a vicious two-on-two battle was underway, the various and sundry smaller critters in the vicinity wisely electing to scatter.
"What's your name again?"
"Oh." With that, Catbert vanished in a puff of noxious smoke.
Chapter 15: THE DUST FINALLY CLEARS
Western North America, 65 MYA:
Ogasawara Islands, July 2004, 5:21 PM.:
Diving for cover, Raptor glanced back at the fray and spied Angillis stumbling about mere feet from the snarling, snapping theropods. She grunted several choice phrases as she sprinted out to grab him. Coiling his tremendous length, Wormy lashed out, snagging both and yanking them to safety. Desperately needing some distraction from the horrendous reek of her savior, Raptor berated Ang.
"What in the name of Dean Devlin™ were you doing out there??" Squirming out of Wormy's oily grasp, she turned her attention back to the fight. And a fight it was! Gushing ichor from multiple bites and slashes, the G-saurs were now back-to-back, intent on mutual protection against their quicker adversaries. Sporting a fresh set of wounds themselves, Chac and Mbembe slowly circled the pair, baleful eyes scanning for any opening. Carefully craning his neck to lick a gash on his companion's shoulder, Jesse stumbled over his own tail, causing both G-saurs to flounder for balance. Releasing dual bellows, Chac and Mbembe barreled in, massive heads lowered and fangs ready. Catching Jesse on his right side, the Giganotosaur reared back and knocked her foe off his feet with a stupendous kick, then plunged in, clamping razor teeth about his throat. Meanwhile, Jesse's mate was giving a better account of herself, meeting Mbembe's charge with a stunning shoulder block, then sweeping his feet from under him with a well-aimed tail swipe. Pinning the Carcharodontosaur down with a foot to the head, she gained Chac's attention with a furious snarl. Thus an impasse was reached.
And way back in the day, things came to a head:
Trudging into the Food Court, Ubergeek paused for a second, taking in the gastronomic spectacle of two female humans (or humanoids, anyway), one perhaps 50 pounds soaking wet, literally inhaling plate after plate of high calorie foodstuffs. Grinning raffishly, he sauntered up and joined in. Several Mech mechanics entering the court snorted at the scene.
"Code Red, people. The Geek's breeding." A healthy round of guffaws ensued. Picking this little exchange up, Uber freed one hand to flip them the Claw™ (much like the Bird®, only pointier), taking care to do so behind his back. He needn't have worried as the young were-Kaiju was mightily occupied with dismantling an order of Ebirah tail.
Fortunately for the purposes of spreading vital information (hungry, angry, etc.), theropod 'language' (a festive mix of roars, shrieks, snarls and physical displays) is universal, although very few non-theropods stick around long enough to decipher it. Chac now employed said language as best she could with a mouthful of Jesse, crouching slightly and releasing a muffled growl. The message: If you value this wretch's life, step away from my consort.
The female Gojirasaur, flaring her lip to bare fangs, released an equally to-the-point reply: Release MY mate, then we'll be working with a fresh kill. Odd metaphor, but what do you expect from a big theropod? For emphasis, Jesse's 'lady' pressed a clawed foot down on the back of Mbembe's neck, provoking a strangled roar from the prone C-saur.
Both females released their charges who scrambled up, dashed to their respective partners and went back to balefully glaring at one another. Narrowing her eyes, Chac released a low chuckle. Annoying as you two are, you actually seem to have a working brain, newcomer. If you want it to KEEP working, stay out of our way.
Same to you, Stumpy. With a parting round of growls, the pairs slowly backed apart, turned and thumped off, glancing furtively back at one another.
Elsewhere, Raptor and Angillis had rejoined the mixed pack when she presented a rather strange offer.
Jogging into the Food Court, Kuroki performed a small double take at the mass of emptied plates, then drew up a chair and sat down at Miyako's invitation.
"So... feel up to those tests just yet?"
"Go right ahead. I've gotta check out something," responded the Geek as he hopped to his feet.
"Where do you think you're going?"
"To see what that Anomaly was about," replied Uber. And find a good heat shield if that kid turns out to be what I think she is, he added silently.
"So, in essence you are suggesting that we periodically visit this... what was it... Ogah-sawar-ah?" inquired a perplexed Gorlack.
"That's the idea, friend. There's a great deal we could learn from each other," was Raptor's response. A slight understatement, to say the least. Such advanced intelligence, communication and tool usage, among dinosaurs yet, would knock the scientific community for a loop. The only problem(s) might entail the outside world (or at least the human portion's response to such discoveries). Homo sapiens, sad to say, were mainly averse to the unknown. As if reading her mind, Seemor spoke up.
"Are you sure there won't be trouble with others of your kind? If I recall, the hu-mans at the odd island didn't look too happy to see us."
"We'd make sure to keep things very low key at first but if you would rather not risk it, I understand."
Gorlack snorted, "Pah... Risk is an element in all life. I accept your offer, hairless primate."
"I suppose it is worth a try," conceded Seemor. Satisfied, Raptor activated a Temporal Surge Protector™-fitted comm array.
"You get that, Pope?"
"Crystal clear, milady. Activating Portal 1 now."
Having run a quick Anomaly Check, the Geekspawn found one such shift within the past half hour, although working with time travel and all, such things are subjective at best. An 'unscheduled' Gojirasaur coupling had occurred 65,000,000 MYA. Powering the console down, he groaned. He had a fairly good idea of at least half the guilty party. His normally rangy gait now rather subdued, the Geek made a beeline for the Genetics Ward© and bumped into Miyako at the entrance.
"Well, Uber, that'll be the last time I put much stock in gene-splicery. The tests came back 'Inconclusive.'" This last word was accompanied with a roll of the eyes.
"Lemme guess... The gadgets could sort out human or Kaiju DNA just fine but were-critters gum up the works?"
"That pretty much sums it up. Of course, the techies couldn't spell it out in so few words." Abruptly, the doors swung outward, disgorging the junior were-Goji, tail twitching happily as she sampled a complimentary lollipop. Sensing a bit of uncertainty between her escorts, the girl gazed curiously from Miyako to Uber and back again. The Geek shrugged.
"I guess it doesn't matter how she got here. This stuff happens all the time anyway. At least we have people who understand." His consort radiated approval with a wide grin.
"I had a feeling you'd see it that way, not that any other way was an option."
"Certainly not." Scooping up the latest addition to his posse, Ubergeek set the giggling toddler atop his wide (if bony) shoulders. "What say we see about a loooong nap for Uncle Geek? It's been quite a week." And off the trio went.
For the moment, all seemed right with the world. An illusion, to be sure but a very comforting one.
THE END (for now)
Ubergeek apologizes for the sugar overdose most of our readers are no doubt suffering. For a quick cure, he recommends THE MURDER OF DESUTOROIA! A Tale of Suspense Amongst Roosters
, c/o Emperor Violenjiger and Gamingboy.
Gamingboy smiled, happy that he had retconned the events which had brought
mass hysteria to the world.
"THE END OF THIS ONE!" DECLARED GAMINGBOY, CREATOR OF ROOSTVILLE, THUS MAKING HIM THE EQUIVALENT OF GOD.
But watch out, because the next one is THE BATTLE OF ROOSTVILLE